As the Pendulum Swings
Archive for May 2012
An Open Letter of Apology
First, I want to apologize if I let anyone think I was angry at them yesterday. I wasn’t. But, today, after a better evening and a good night’s rest, I realize that I may have been conveying some emotions that really weren’t present. In summation, I know I need to be seen. Maybe not hospitalized, … Continue reading
Friends of Mania
All of my bipolar blogging buddies. I really, really need your help. I wish I could write this more smoothly, and with a lot less pressure and distress. I hope this doesn’t come out a jumbled mess. I’m writing texts and emails to people and leaving out whole paragraphs, because somewhere between my head and … Continue reading
Sorting It Out
I have always felt like I had a “base mood”, which is the state I’m in. Depressive, hypomanic, stable. I noticed that there was kind of an “atmospheric mood”, which was a wispy, temporary mood state that would come through. I’ve always characterized this as weather. This emotional weather is just about as predictable as … Continue reading
Owning It
I had never considered Borderline Personality Disorder. The term “Personality Disorder” carries so many negative connotations. It assumes that it’s a defect of someone’s personality. That in itself assumes that a person can just snap out of it, or just change it. BPD gets such a bad rap in the media. I thought of “Fatal … Continue reading
Working Up To It
I have always thought of myself as a pretty open book. I don’t flat out lie. If I am asked a question, I will always try to answer it honestly and to the best of my ability. Any misinformation is either from a miscommunication or an accidental omission. I have been having symptoms far enough … Continue reading
Sensory Integration Dysfunction and Mental Disorder
Most of my research in the past has been centered around affective disorders, theories surrounding the causation of dysfunction, and the cognition / behaviors that sustain it. I am broadening my horizons to include many mental health disorders and developmental disorder, particularly autism. I have had a theory for awhile that hinged almost completely on … Continue reading
Tides – A Short Update
I can go ahead and brainstorm all I want. Did I mention the moderately severe mania / mixed episode with psychotic features? If I did, forgive my memory. If I didn’t, then one could guess as to why. Now, hear me out before rapid fire email begins. The severity and nature changes day by day. … Continue reading
For Now, Not Farewell
First, and foremost, I wanted to let all of my wonderful blogging friends know that I am alright. The gaps between posts keep getting larger, and I worry that others are worrying. I will make you a promise now that if something serious happens and there is a critical situation, I will not hesitate to … Continue reading
Absences and Avoidance
As many of you are aware, I don’t typically write posts specifically addressing my fellow bloggers. Today, in a desperate plea for help, I am encouraging everyone to read. First, and foremost, I want to provide reassurance that I am “stable”. I put the quotations, because I don’t mean stable as in a stable state. … Continue reading
Trigger Warning
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